Orlando, without rides?

I'm writing this from #Orlando, Florida, on a beautiful day that defies typical late-May Florida weather. It is clear and actually cool (72 this morning--go ahead and laugh, but that is unheard of for Florida this time of year). What I realized this morning is that this visit marks the third consecutive trip to Orlando without going on a single amusement ride, or spending a single penny in one of the many enormous theme parks here. How is that possible? I shall explain. The first two time, I was hired by a law firm to conduct an investigation inside the Magic Kingdom. The task? Find an employee who is trying to defraud his insurance company on a personal injury case. You see, this person is claiming all sorts of debilitating injuries, and claiming that he is unable to walk and work without the use of a cane. Conducting a #surveillance inside #Disney World is ridiculously easy. No one suspects that you are sitting by a parade with a camcorder, filming. No one, in fact is paying any attention to you at all. Everyone is busy with their own kids and their own entertainment. I stood not thirty feet away from my target and filmed him (walking briskly, bending and stooping with the dexterity of a 20-year old gymnast, without the cane, which dangled uselessly from his arm the whole time), and no one was the wiser. Just in case, I waved occasionally to my invisible family. Once I had gotten enough damning footage, I left--resisting the urge to buy fudge on Main Street--and went home. "You're not going on a ride?" My wife asked me on the phone. "Not a ride, nor a turkey leg," I responded. "I'm here for work, and my work is done. See you soon." My only concern during this adventure was Disney's security force, which I had always heard was legendary, with underground video surveillance rooms and hundreds of cameras placed all over the park. I fully expected someone to come up and tap me on the shoulder, asking why I, a single man with a camera, haven't gone on a ride or bought a bag of popcorn. All I had done was film the parade. But they never showed. My second trip to Orlando was for the same purpose, same case. The #lawyers wanted more documentation of the fake injuries, and just as easily, I got it. Again, there was no reason--or desire--for me to go on a ride while I was there, alone. Again, there was no intervention from the much-lauded Disney security force. My third trip to Orlando---this very Memorial Day weekend, was a family reunion of sorts. My cousin's son and family were here, and several cousins and relatives I had not seen in many years were joining them. My wife and I made the 3-1/2 hour drive from Miami, had a great lunch and visit with my cousins at their resort, and my wife got to visit a childhood friend on the bargain. Our kids are all grown and out of the house. There was no reason to go to Disney, Epcot, or anywhere else. That's three in a row. I don't know if the #Guinness Book of Records keeps track of such streaks, but I'm pretty impressed, and my bank account is happy about the whole thing. It is likely, however, that one day my son will bring his family down from #Boston, now that my grandkids are almost four and two years old. Until that time when I go to Disney with them, my record stands.